Tag: Suicide

The Wounded Me

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

The wound had festered,
Under,
Unseen,
Growing,
Until it reached the surface,
There it was open,
The air stung,
How I did shriek!
Unable to believe such harm had been,
Was of, was in
me,
But it could not be unseen,
Unfelt,
And beckoning alone would not heal,
And so I gathered gauze of aid,
And let in the attendants for my mind and soul,
To dress the painful opening that was now exposed,
And it promised not to close,
To be stubborn as cells stitched together a flesh bandage for the wound,
And it was painful,
The knowing, the being, the healing.

Time passed,
Much time passed,
And I look back on an invisible scar in disbelief,
How was that me?
Who was that me?
The wound is closed,
But the memory of phantom pain shocks my mind once in a while,
And strange photos,
Strange writings,
Strange thoughts of things not as they really were
come back to me,
To me,
To the me that is whole,
Healed,
But who remains vigilant,
For the feared return of the wounded me
that once resided here.

Breathe (It will be okay)

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

Your hurting hurts,
The pain may linger,
But you are strong
Even at your weakest,
Even when you can do nothing
But cry,
You persevere,
Because
What else can you do?
You could give up,
But you won’t,
And you don’t,
And still you must cry,
Tears bathe your wounds,
And then you breathe,
Another breath,
Another day,
And yes,
It will be okay

Let Down Your Guard

~ Vanessa ~ 1 Comment

If only you could see,
What I have seen,
What others have seen,
To know you are not alone,
To know you have more than a reflection,
To take on this weight,
Ghosts you see are too much for one to wrestle,
Let down your guard,
You need not remain on the battlefield,
Let others carry a torch for you
To see,
The demons are incorporeal,
And you need not be locked in their domain,
Let down your guard,
Take off your stoicism,
Let your human nature be tended,
For the tender nature it is,
You are fragile,
not weak,
Your soul needs time and space to mend,
Give You that opportunity,
That you would give
To any other,
You are but a child
of the universe,
The universe wants to see you whole,
You are but stardust,
Handle your twinkling light,
Even when it flickers,
Delicately;
Let down your guard.

Your Meaning*

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

You.
You are.
Your existence is not meaningless,
It has had meaning before you could ever even know,
Your actual meaning you may never fully know,
But it is there,
Others see it,
moreover feel it,
Even at a distance,
We know,
it is fully embracing,
There is more,
More meant for you,
Even when times seem endlessly void,
There is an outlet, a point, a goal,
Perhaps you have hints of it,
Or perhaps it is around a bend,
But this is not all,
Your hardship is not pointless,
You are maturing,
into the being you were meant to ripen into,
Your purpose,
your purposes may not be obvious,
now or ever to you,
Persevere,
There is a point,
There is meaning,
There is good
In the fact that
you Live.

  • Written for A.M.

Passion of the Child

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

July 2, 2006

Child,
is it worth the forfeit
This life you think you know?
Never to meet the dawn
Nor the sunset
That is always
Anew

Child,
So young,
What do you know?
What does the world know
Of you?

Suffer the day
Fight until dusk
But determine to taste
The fruit born
Of your tears
To do so,
bask in another morn’ s sun
You must

Sweet Dreamer

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

Written 2003

Sweet dreamer
The tears you have cried
Are prayers
Each one
Don’t hold them inside

Hope for the future
Let go of the past
Your day will soon come
This pain will not last

Hold tight to your dreams
And though you may cry
Live for today
Tomorrow you’ll fly