Tag: Pride

After the Fall

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

Turned around in reflection,
What I found
I couldn’t accept,
Couldn’t escape,
Digging deeper, I aimed
to connect the pieces,
To right the wrongs
Atone for my transgressions
From when I didn’t know
Me,
And of my falling;
Fallen,
I have to stop
Now,
And look up
To see the light that guided me
back here to my ground-zero;
New moves,
About-face
to pull up
Stand strong,
Be proud
Of all I’ve come through
and back again,
Ready now
To live,
To write next pages
With fresh ink
Vision cleared,
Purpose,
And a sharpened point to this,
My life

Break Molds

~ Vanessa ~ 1 Comment

I break molds,
Always have;

Despite how one might read me
I compulsively add caveats,
Exceptions to the case;
Once upon a time,
Frustrated by being outside boxes provided
I aimed to understand,
Why the damn boxes even existed,
A lifetime up to now
I realize they were created for the same reason
I was on a quest
–To understand,
A something that is beyond
Our understanding
–Understanding
Ourselves;

See I was never an anomaly
I was just the first
and only me;
My exceptions broke a mold
that never truly fit,
It’s people like me who continually fix it
–The question,
Not the answer;
It’s ever expansive,
The knowing of self,
It’s the frustration,
The confusion,
The loss and despair,
That makes us gaze in a mirror one day
And appreciate the person there;
Without the pains,
the pleasure of being
Is never so sweet,
lost to be found,
We only appreciate
And think to look up,
From the ground;

I break molds
Always will

“They Called Me Tina Turner, again”

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

As a child
Kids tauntingly called me,
for reasons I could not see,
“Tina Turner”.
I balked at the comparison
That I could not understand
Because
That
Was not my name.
I scoffed
Because I was just a child,
And not, however old the singer was then;
I hated it.
I hated it because
I couldn’t understand
What being black and beautiful
Even as a child meant
And yes, often
It meant gazes of judgment from foreign eyes
About who and what I was
It mean negative perceptions
But it also meant the good.
And now I appreciate my mother’s response
That the tears of this child could not fathom then.

“They called me Tina Turner, again”

“Yes”,
And I was reminded that I had just been
awarded,
an unintentional compliment;
Of comparison to one of the
Greatest of all time:
The astonishing gorgeous,
Talented,
Resilient,
Powerhouse
Who is
Tina Turner.

“Why not be proud?”

Crocus

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

I try to remember
Who I was
Before I started this journey,
A journey of journeys,
where I have left what I know
And found gems along the road
With each step;
Fallen,
And scraped more than my knees,
Scratched beneath my
Surface,
And looked to see who I am underneath;
I wonder and look back to find
Who I once was,
I know she would not recognize me now,
And at times I worry, of sharing all on this path with others
But deep down, I know,
Damn!
How proud She–me of the past—
would be
if she
knew
All I’ve traversed,
The hell and high water I have overcome,
And still come out able
To find beauty
In the crocus of Spring
In its vibrant yet gentle purple petals;
That crocus
That is me,
Having pushed up through toughened winter dirt,
Broken free,
To not just be beautiful,
But to welcome others
Out,
And to be amazed by their own epic journeys.

Pride Colors

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

I will love myself,
For myself,
Because of myself,
And all that I am
All that I represent,
My love for life and others
Will not be the shame of me,
I will wear these colors
A rainbow,
A spectrum of beauty,
proudly,
And applaud my siblings
As they wave their own flags