Philia: An Ode to Friendships

At times I cannot see
My best friends
No, they are not imaginary,
I could not imagine such real,
Such complex,
So beautiful, intricately crafted,
Crafting,
Pieces of living art.

And for me they are the caring,
The loving,
The knowing,
The voices when advocacy is needed,
The silence when just
they
Are needed.

Their presence
Remains,
When all others depart.
They are the set-up
And clean-up crew,
They are the party and the
Private after party;
They are there.

Philia;
This love I feel
In the deep recesses
Of my heart and soul.
For these diamonds
That at times go unseen,
Their flaming shine
Goes unforgotten
In my mind.
And in my heart
These friends– their love, and my love for them,
They stay.

Take Some Time

I’m scared
Of being open,
Of letting myself
relax
Enough to feel your touch,
Is it real?
Is this real?
Or just another illusion?
I can’t be,
won’t be,
taken for a fool,
again,
I leave my heart out,
But watch from a distance,
Guarded,
Prepared to snatch it back,
Should your ways appear
Less than

My heart,
She still hurts,
Weight of the past
Pulling,
With each beat,
Beating still,
Beating for you,
But I don’t trust anything anymore,
Familiar places and faces
Are now foreign to me,
Unfamiliar the motions,
For this dance of courtship
Is awkward,
And yet it pulls
Like a magnet,
The force making “us” natural,
Still
This heart she weeps,
Riddled With battle wounds,
This
is going to take
Some time.

Out There…

It hurts,
How deep you hurt me,
Betrayal doesn’t just fall away,
As it heals,
It leaves a visceral scar,
With an itch,
A deep burn
That remains,

I love
you,
And with that the pain pangs,
A throbbing suspicion lays under
my heart that wants your love,
But also values truth and trust,
Honesty,


Honestly,
Can you love me,
Without want or need,
Of an unknown more,
Question Mark,
Of something
Someone
Out

There…?