We’re almost face to
face,
But you won’t look at me,
Make light with
jokes,
When this is so
Uncomfortable,
I tell you that
I love you,
I’m in love, still,
And you can’t
Return
the
feeling,
But won’t walk away,
Won’t see
me go;
And so belabor the pain.
Tag: Loss
Next to You
Oh how it hurts,
Knowing I may not end up
Next to you,
But how I will try,
To stay by your side.
(Not Sorry) I Love You
I love you,
You know that,
And we’ve been through so much,
Come so far,
And I love you,
So I am sorry if I loved you before you were ready,
In a way you can’t love me,
But I love you,
So I want your happiness,
Even if that means without me,
Even if this feels like death,
I am sorry,
sad this is,
As it is
But I am not sorry I love you.
Putting Down the Dog
“Let’s go for a walk, “
He said
“Just us,”
And to our daughter that she should stay home with her aunt and uncle,
Unusual,
I made a cryptic joke,
About putting a dog down on such a walk,
I was to realize just how close such a phrase was,
We walked out back
–Our daughter followed,
And we rested in the middle of a vacant path,
And in a clear, but quivering voice
He shot me
With words of “it’s me, not you”,
And “I love you, but I’m not in love…”,
And as tears bled from my brown eyes,
I was suddenly alone,
Part of my heart dying there on the gravel road,
My body has moved,
With aimless motions,
In a daze,
And as it all settles in,
I am still here,
Like a put down dog,
Dying.
(On Your Next Plane) Fly Free
I am
wrecked
by guilt
That I never thought this possible
That I never reached out
before
You were gone,
Before
you were gone too soon,
Taken by a force too much
For your precious body,
You were more to us
Than you ever knew,
I should have told you,
You were an inspiration,
I should have told you,
You were a light,
I should have told you,
You were a best friend,
I hope you knew,
For now it is too late,
And I curse fate,
For taking the good so soon,
Too soon,
Before you had lived your life,
Been old with time,
May your body rest
in peace,
May your soul
fly free,
To inhabit the next phase of your metamorphosis,
This world was not deserving
of your beauty,
Of your goodness,
And for that I am sure
this is not the end
For you,
On your next plane
you will do,
you will be,
Something even greater,
More deserving of your soul,
You will be missed,
My soul sister,
And as tears burn my eyes,
I know for your soul I do not cry,
But for the loss of our world from knowing you,
May we find you again,
In a free spirit,
In a new babe born,
Dearest,
More than anything you are loved,
And dearest
Oh how you shall be missed,
Visit us when you can,
In the whisper of the wind,
In a smile from a memory,
And I do not doubt it,
That you
We shall never forget.
For Me
He played a song
For me,
A song he said was mine,
Written surely
For me,
He confessed,
And I saw in his eyes a tenderness,
I had not seen before,
That read of love, and hurt,
and fear,
That said he had before wept tears,
And that those had been for me,
Over me too.
She of Letters 