Tag: lesson

Learning Parenthood

~ Vanessa ~ 1 Comment

I don’t know
How to do what I am doing
–Fake it till you make it,
But each age changes the game,
And I am back to square one,
Learning
Learning how to be the teacher,
Who vaguely knows the lesson,
A novice at the most important task,
Of raising up the babies,
But this is how it goes,
As even the seasoned
Don’t really know,
We learn from our mistakes,
And oh there are many!
We learn from the wisdom
The innocence of youth bestows,
We learn,
We learn,
And then we learn again

32 Years

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

This evening I turn 32;
A decade since I cried
With bronchitis
Not knowing what to do,
A decade since I swore I’d failed,
That not knowing what would come next
Is what was making me fail

This evening I turn 32,
So much has passed since I feared

My body was at the end of the line,

That my chance of treatment was only giving me
Borrowed time

This evening I turn 32,
A flip of my favorite number
A number I’m not sure why,
but I’m drawn to,
Everytime

This evening I turn 32,
And look back
at what 32 has brought me,
It’s not perfect
But it’s mine
My heart
Inside

And then there is
The heart that beats
Outside my breast,
And snores
To assure me,
Yes she takes another breath;
And a love that snores much deeper
Than our babe
On the other side
of my body

This evening
I turn
32,
And like at years 3 and 2
Insomnia wakes my dreams
To wonder on ,
And on,
And overthink
My next 2 to 3, to 32 years