Butterfly Returns

Butterfly went home
After their first flight;
Home to cocoons
And caterpillars,
Who each longed to know of their possible future,
But could not yet understand
What air beneath one’s wings
Could feel like,
Each at their own time to cocoon
Metamorphosis awaiting at their own pace,
In their own way;
Not all will get to fly
For some time is much shorter
But they all change,
They all in the end are freed
Of corporeal vessels
Of various form,
Even if they will never know
The flight of a butterfly,
They all may appreciate
The diversity in their shapes
And the cycle
That unites them all.

I See Us (Colors)

I look at our daughter

And I see


I see


I see


But the world,

Petty and shallow

Sees only monochrome,

Sees not the sunken space under eye that is


AND the straight chestnut hair

That is you,

The smile like cupids bow

From me

The sharp eyebrow arch from you,

The cheeks,

The small ears– Of my father

The chin,

The height,

The perfect creation

In combination of us,

Can’t they see?

Can’t they see?

Can’t they see beyond


And white?

Yes, they are Colorblind,


The spectrum,

To hues never before seen,

The hues that  were made from you AND me.

The hue that is, she.

They’ll deny me,

Deny you,

Deny us “parent,”

Because they cannot dare to see,

What is right in front of them,

Dare to believe,

Dare to accept



Parting Pennsylvania

We traveled the roads
Traced the Appalachian to the end of the trail,
Found flat land in Ohio,
And wondered if we saw the edge of forever.

Turned back around to where my family is found
The space I remembered,
With something missing.

Felt the drop of my heart floor once more,
Knowing she is only partway here
Though her spirit everywhere,
And with him still
–Papa, in his recliner
Watching the great-grand kids play,
I brew and bring him Coffee
Cream, no sugar,
Little offerings,
Of thanks,
For everything that is,
Everything we are.

As I reach back in generations
I feel closeness to the Divine,
To the source,
Tears are all I have,
To praise and comfort
For we are live, and we are mortal.
As the morning broached;
The heaviness settles to the bottom of my heart,
I am smiling,
With tears in eyes,
Never knowing the finality of each time we part,
Knowing love,
And that must be enough.

And Even Then…

Is this the anxiety male counterparts typically feel,
A coming of age that aches with pangs of hope and fear?
Of possible humiliation
And unrequited feelings;
Laid bare,
Like guitar strings never plucked?
I am lost,
In knowing what I want,
What I’m willing to do and be,
But I’m stepping into shoes that feel too big for me,
Sized 17 to be exact,
Sized for you,
And it fit so perfectly,
I undid us,
Untied it all,
Left us dangling
In my insanity
And now
Now I’ve grown,
I’ve learned,
We’ve grown,
We’ve learned,
And now I want,
I want,
Gluttonous I want nothing but this
And more of this
Of us,
Because I cannot imagine a day
A night,
A moment
That you’re
Nor a moment
That you’re not in
my life,
I would go to the ends of the Earth,
If it meant you might have a moment of peace,
I would bear unspeakable pain
If it meant you could share my greatest gift,
I would go without love,
If I could not have yours,
For you are something
I was undeserving of,
That I was too naïve and fragile to be entrusted with,
And yet you trusted me still.

I am foolish to expect second chances,
Or perhaps fate was never meant to be questioned by a fool,
And opportunity and courage are devised to set things right,
I have never loved as I love this one,
This man that I know, and who knows me,
For whom I am suddenly speechless;
Wanting nothing
Every ounce of his being to want and need my own,
And For promises of wizened lovers
Of “until death do us part,”

And even then…

But I Do Know (Love)

Is love like a spell that we must invoke,
Does it lay in waiting,
Until it’s summoned?
Does it exist around us like air,
That we breathe in and out?
Does it only reside inside us,
As a system, or pump through us like blood?
Is love alive, does it beathe, but seem stationary like a tree?
Does it have memory, history like water in the ocean?
Does love evolve, like living creatures,
Or is it static, never changing, always being?
I know love,
but I also don’t know,
Love seems to be all these by things,
In and out of us,
Love a spirit, love a diety, love a force rooted in the creation of existence,
There are so many things I don’t know about this,
But I do know
I love you,
And that love

For Them I Go

Moments such as this,
When I am alone in thought and deed,
I think of all that sustains me,
Of the others from whom I gain my strength,
My motive to rise
To meet the day,
My will to be,
I am nothing without the others,
And they are everything to me,
And from them,
for them,
I will,
Even when they are not near,
Or even should they no longer be here,
I will and do,
For family, blood and otherwise,
They whom are my life force,
My lifeline,
My all,
And so for them I go,
Set out into the unknown,
The sky,
The deep,
And through it all,
I shall remember who,
Their faces etched in mind,
To sustain me,
Deep breath,
One step,
I go.