I See Us (Colors)

I look at our daughter

And I see

Me,

I see

You,

I see

Us.

But the world,

Petty and shallow

Sees only monochrome,

Sees not the sunken space under eye that is

Me,

AND the straight chestnut hair

That is you,

The smile like cupids bow

From me

The sharp eyebrow arch from you,

The cheeks,

The small ears– Of my father

The chin,

The height,

The perfect creation

In combination of us,

Can’t they see?

Can’t they see?

Can’t they see beyond

Black,

And white?

Yes, they are Colorblind,

To

The spectrum,

To hues never before seen,

The hues that  were made from you AND me.

The hue that is, she.

They’ll deny me,

Deny you,

Deny us “parent,”

Because they cannot dare to see,

What is right in front of them,

Dare to believe,

Dare to accept

Together,

Us.

I am Beautiful

I am beautiful
God damnit,
I need no you
To tell me so,
I will dress my hips,
And paint my lips
To allure my own reflection.

I am beautiful
God damnit,
I need no you
To make me doubt,
I wear my heart,
Inside and out,
Beauty is in the eye,
And I am the beholder.

I am beautiful,
God damnit
Breathtaking,
Jaw dropping-ly so,
And though I don’t care
I have eyes on me
Everywhere I go

I am beautiful
God damnit
This is not vanity,
This is self love,
A true love confession,
A much needed appreciation,
Of me.

Leaving Master’s House

All my self doubt,
Desire to prove
My worth
Was always part of the plan,
To drive me deep into the invisible Master’s hand,
That I should feel an ache of need
Where it need not be.
But from youth
I questioned,
Reverse engineered,
Dismantled my world to try to see,
What others might find to be wrong with me,
And I backed myself into the corner,
To the planned “tragic” position,
But this time I was not alone,
In the corner I found,
“Human”,
“sentient”,
“living”,
“Organic”,
And I put a mirror up to self and surroundings,
To see the thick of oppression,
We are swimming in the deep end of,
The oppression that from birth guilts the innocent
Into assimilation,
Without their knowledge or consent;
I am in the same colonial waste as my siblings,
with differing side effects from the toxins,
My color, my pedigree, my gender, disability, sexuality
are all just ways to peg me,
But how I view them does change the game,
I have my own damn tools,
And I am leaving master’s house.

Things Have Changed

Written 2017

2011 – Age
“He’s an old man, ignore him.
Don’t let his talk bother you–he’s stuck in his ways, you can’t change him now…
But things have changed, so you don’t have to worry about it.
It’s not like there will be a cross burning in the front yard tonight. ”

2003 – Waiting
Things have changed

“Things have changed,” I’ve been saying that to myself my entire life. Meanwhile,  at the same time I have felt a great urgency in the need to “save the world” from the unchanged.

But things have changed. I want to believe that, to feel safe; Continue reading “Things Have Changed”