Category: Theology

Guiding Me

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

Naming values
Is easier said
Than done,
Defining what motivates,
What drives,
What guides,
Is like catching the breath you breathe,
But, it can be done,
It can be done,
To claim a fraction of one’s identity,
What guides me?
Love;
Belief in good;
In the innate neutrality of all nature;
In the naivete of mind, driven by self-preservation, for survival;
In a unity, interconnectedness of all beings,
-Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually;
In the reality that there is more than we can ever know;
That minds and knowledge are a gift;
In ultimate truth, unencumbered by belief;
In the beauty and necessary of diversity- cosmic creativity;
In the innate equal worth of all humans;
In the equal value of all creatures;
In the need for salvation as a daily occurrence, not for the end of times, or judgement;
In the reality of karmic balance;
In a spiritual realm, that we may never understand, though we might catch glimpses;
In evolution as a part of Divine creation;

This list is a theological reflection of mind,
Capturing pieces of my soul in diction,
But it is endlessly incomplete,
As I grow,
Moment to moment,
Understanding more,
But these remain with me,
The realized and unrealized,
Guiding in step,
Guiding in deed,
Guiding me.

Apocalyptic Change

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

The world is in pain,
It burns fire,
As bombs fall,
As the ground breaks open in despair,
There is so much pain,
This is the Apocalypse,
It has happened before
It shall happen again,
Great changes are here,
Are coming,
The question is what we
The people do next,
Do we fall, and freeze,
Or do we heed the call
The herald for changes,
The world is changing,
We are changing too.

Awakening Showers

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

While in the hospital last year I experienced an awakening. As my treatment progressed, self-care was my primary concern (as a mom self-care is often neglected). I slowly became accustomed to caring for my own vessel as I might a new babe; therein it is fitting that patients here were given Johnson & Johnson’s baby wash to bathe.


In bathing, as I was cleansed with this scent of infancy, under a large rain-like shower head I was overcome by beauteous imagery. I could envision myself, as myself, and also of a diety carefully bathing, and from the soapy froth forming creation, light, and life; A goddess carefully combing her hair and the lose strands that fell becoming new beings, out of the coils- bits of divine DNA. How carefully she would need to care for herself, to keep all of existence in balance. Every move the being made, having an impact on heavenly bodies and their atmospheres, on the weather of the cosmos- all related to her own equilibrium.


I went to then mediate, and write on this. I felt a humbled and yet honored sense of connection as I had been gifted a vision that I might best be able to understand the powers that be, and how to grasp the importance and lesson of caring just as delicately for the life that is me. My heart swells with disbelief and amazement for the images bestowed upon me, which are beyond my normal scope of thinking. I am in awe of how such thoughts came to me, and of considering: why? I continue to wonder of this experience and recognize new meanings for my own being, and for others, for the earth, nature, all of which are in need of care, as even a mother deity would need, in order to keep the everything well cared for. I think of the advice on airplanes to put on one’s own oxygen mask first, and on the idea that “cleanliness is next to godliness”, — I appreciate that in letting myself accept the open arms in a hospital setting, and baring myself to the unknown, I Iet in a light that I had been warding off while not taking the same care with myself, as I had others, and thereby not leaving space for the divine to enter.

Dichotomy

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

Self Discovery,
In the pursuit of hunting words,
I find my take on the infinite,
My discussions with the universe,
The supreme beyond the capacity for any
Being,
It is everything, and is in everything,
And we are composed of it,
Stardust,
But more,
Greater,
Stardust creator,
I would not call it God,
For surely it is beyond,
Beyond concern,
And of concern for even immortal creations,
Does our sin offend it?
Surely not,
For we are created of it’s complex knots,
Of seeming contradictions,
Good and evil,
Up and down,
In and out:
Dichotomy.

My Spirituality

~ Vanessa ~ Leave a comment

My spirituality is ethereal,
I am floating in the cosmos,
With an Earth mother by my side,
It is a view of spirits real, and tangible at every turn,
My spirituality is elastic,
Growing, stretching, malleable
With the more I come to know,
My spirituality is multiple
In its sources of knowledge,
Of coming to understand what is and what is not,
My spirituality is a song,
A familiar, siren song that awakens parts of my soul
I never knew existed,
My spirituality is eclectic,
It does not follow a straight and narrow,
But rather a loose and wide,
To absorb wonders of a limitless everything that has come to be,
My spirituality is real,
It is more powerful when named,
When identified,
It is beautiful, magickal,
It is of and in me, sustaining me,
Grounding me,
For fear without it,
This body composed of stardust might
Simply float away,
Leaving this glorious spirit bare.